Skip to main content

Age of Villainy

Past two night were perhaps the most comfortable I have graced thus far, despite in the past I have said never to dabble again in hostelsurfing (just because I had realised that spending all that money has not been all that worth it). Just I felt that it was an important occasion at this particular moment being that it had been so cold out in the open to the teeth. Squatting at my hedge (defensively begotten) in Hyde Park had been mostly deplorable. Almost impossible to conceive the struggle and difficulties of my days to days, and, despite having no beneficial returns and the prospect of losing advantage for the upcoming December charade, it was then that I felt compelled to return to my temporary accommodational relief. Besides, my work in Roundhouse for the Christmas runs will guarantee me a return here in the nearest future, so it might be best for me to just let it pass. It should not be as detrimental to my pockets if I pray the cards right.

So I woke up slightly groggy this morning, but better than the usual, having spent all of yesterday with la ragazza dei miei sogni on a Facebook marathon. It had been very common and typical days recently (with little to no effect on my person, save for a miscalculation a week ago on a certain predicament that led me to spending a bit more than necessary). Still, not as bad as the situation a few months ago, when I zeroed my bank account for a few hours' touch moments of morning sex. Never again. It was then that I knew I had fucked up thoroughly, jeopardising everything I had done previously over a fool's whim. Besides the groggy morning I had suffered, today had given me a renewed perspective about simple things that are otherwise thought of as mundane. While my ability to write had stagnated over the past few weeks, or months even, my desire to pull through this rut had overcome complacency and adversity and great vigour and ferocity had emerged in its stead. New inspirations have propelled me to revisit a familiar interest and my intent is to go along with it as it stands. Today marks a great new age for villainy. Donald Trump's emergence in the United States as its new head of state offers great opportunity, and a confirmation of my own deep desires to bring out what society deems difficult of me; Rodrigo Duterte's bid to improve the quality of life in the Philippines; and Miriam's imminent arrival. These are things that really mindstruck me recently, and perhaps take some time to poke into while I wallow into my own craven tirades. God knows I cannot wait to shaken the tailbottoms of my Murican brethren about Trump especially after making light of Britain's concern with regards to its departure from the European Union. But until then it might as well be that the machination of everyone I thought were different from mine were actually much closer than I deemed it to be.

Popular posts from this blog

And then...

Four hours and ticking and I cannot seem to be copacetic to the privacy of her suspicious absence. How could I be when frightening tremors had shook their country just earlier today? It has been quite common to read about earthquakes rocking Italy recently, and the more these events take place, the more people feel less surprised about the fatalities. At the moment, I can sit on this chair being bothered by Starbucks personnel every half an hour or so, waiting for updates of Miriam's whereabouts. Surely she would be safe. I suppose my fears always come back to bite me in my arse. This is a farcry from mine fears. Far be it from the truth, I will not let it tear me asunder. She will be back to me soon enough, and then it would not take long before she will be in my arms, singing praises of our love, beneath the starry sky and our duvet. There is this unusual feeling of dread knowing that tomorrow I will be once again immersed into a job that I do not love; a return to form; of bei…

Strange Fruit

I had recently adorned a vow of silence for myself with Miriam for no apparent reason whatsoever other than to suit my whim, and, regardless of the pettiness associated with this misdemeanour, I pray this will only strengthen us both in spirit for the coming days. The coming days are definitely not meant for one such as me.
In the next few hours, not shortly before I am done with this piece, this vow will be disavowed. Miriam is sleeping soundly in my right, broken by the exhaustion that seemed to catch her unaware. This was not what she had prepared for when coming to London. This was not what I meant for her when I asked her to come. In order to alleviate the guilt of me making it more difficult for us both, I do what it is that I do best, and that is to love her hungrily and wildly. And some little bit of swag on the side to cure her state of frustration albeit temporarily.
My days are long and yet wields very little. For now I do and take whatever I can, whenever I can. A grand f…

Uff

Call it a burning desire to urinate on the system that we as people have established; status quo. Felt a huge fluctuation of anxiety when I finished this day earlier than what I would have thought or expected, and it was technically my first day of job (again), and huge surges of this same rhetoric came pouring back in when Miriam and I have not been having proper back-and-forths since yesterday. It was as if we had lost interest with one another just like that. Either that or I have been consumed by the same system of dependency. The bug that I caught long ago that ruined me to smithereens.
The long-winding hours, that which I felt was necessary, was to be a time of reprieve and a time to catch breath. It turned out to be much more toxic that it should be, and it came to pass faster than it should and I now feel poisoned and abused by the thought of having allowed this in the first place. Tomorrow is what I would consider a real test of my endurance, when I work from seven in the mo…